I would ask for some insight into our football “scandals,” but I’m too busy reading preseason stories on Harrison Barnes and the Tar Heel basketball team.  Only 3 more months…
- Chris, Chapel Hill

Even with that talent, nobody seems to care.  Marvin Austin, the #1 DT in the country according to Mel Kiper is was so desperate for attention that he’s been tweeting about illegal benefits, strip clubs, and his morning wood. (Google at your own peril.)  After months of this, Austin finally closed down his twitter account after announcing to the world that he was ordering bottles of expensive champagne at an exclusive nightclub in Miami.  (That was the whitest translation of a tweet we’ve ever had to make.)

 

 
The UNC football team is the high school girl who can never seem to get the boys’ attention, no matter how hard she tries.  Now that the football team has effectively flashed the entire senior class from the back of the school bus, it will be interesting to see whether the team’s desire for attention clouds their will to win an ACC title.

 THE U IS BACK YOU BETTER GIVE UM SOME LOVE!!!
-Anonymous

 

It’s easy to get excited about the U revival, but don’t forget that this team’s success hinges on a guy who intends to wear a “pink suit, pimp cup and all” to the NFL draft.  Jacory Harris is definitely an electric talent, but his inconsistencies doomed the Hurricanes last year.  In their 3 losses, Harris threw 3 TDs against 7 INTs.

The talent is back (particularly on the defensive line) but the schedule should prevent the U from fully returning to the national conversation.

 

 

I’ve been a Seminole fan since I was a kid, and I’m still not sure whether to be embarrassed or proud that my head coach’s name is “Jimbo.”
- Nate, Huntington NY

Ask yourself this – would Nick Saban allow people to call him “Nicky?”  How about Urban Meyer?  Could you see Bill Belichick introducing himself as “Billy?” How about Mikey Tomlin?

We have no reason to disrespect Jimbo Fisher, but we’re hung up on the name.  Whether he succeeds or not, it’s still going to be difficult to comprehend a Florida State team without Bobby Bowden on the sidelines.



We would really love to see the transcripts of the conversations the past few years between Bowden and the Florida State AD.  And by “love to see it” we mean love to see it the way we love to see videos like this:

 

 

Is there a more hostile conversation than telling an elderly loved one that it’s just time to give it up?  We imagine Bowden reacted the same way our grandpa acted when we told him we wouldn’t let him drive anymore because hitting 4 pedestrians in a 17 day stretch was just 4 too many.  After it was all said and done, he questioned our sexuality, took us off his will, and farted 3 times.  

So, whether you like it or not, it’s Jimbo Time in Tallahassee.  And that sure as hell beats the old Bobby Bowden Saturday afternoon routine…Nap Time.

 

 Top 5 names in the ACC?
- Will, Charlotte

5. Ramon Boii, DT, WAKE  – A huge fan of Cam’ron’s 2002 hit single, “Oh Boii”  

 4.  Quan Sturdivant, OLB, UNC

 3.  Ray Ray Armstong, FS, MIAMI – A name only a Hurricane could rock

 2.  Barquell Rivers, ILB, VA TECH – The Hokies’ Barquell is worse than their bite

 1. Ras-I Dowling – An Egyptian Pharoah of the 18th dynasty

If that goitre on Frank Beamer’s face gets any bigger, I’m going to have to head out to Blacksburg and pop that thing myself.  
- Channing, Charlottesville

 

 

 

 Ok, we laughed.  But in truth, Beamer’s face is scarred from a skin graft he received after a major car accident.  We don’t expect that information to stop opposing fans from calling it an aborted fetus, and we don’t expect your stomach to stop churning whenever you notice the thing jiggle a little when he gets particularly animated.

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